


In Which Jane And Roxy Make Sock Puppets

by traceExcalibur



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Sock Puppets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-21
Updated: 2012-01-21
Packaged: 2017-10-29 21:03:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/324152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/traceExcalibur/pseuds/traceExcalibur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jane, at Roxy's house, is treated to an impromptu puppet show. A little minific written for a friend of mine. The title is very self-explanatory.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Which Jane And Roxy Make Sock Puppets

“You have got to be kidding me, Ro-Lal.”

Roxy Lalonde was sitting in front of Jane Crocker holding a red sock with ridiculous felt strings for poofy hair, two button eyes, and a crude imitation of the Betty Crocker logo sewn on, and no, she was not kidding.

“Listen, Jane, you gotta believe me this time,” Roxy said, waving the sock puppet as if it was the crux of a conspiracy theory. “I’m sure I’ve figured her out, and I am going to blow your think pan open!”

“With sock puppets?” Jane tilted her head, skeptical as always.

“Yeah! Strider gave me the idea. Said there’s nothing you can’t solve with puppets, or something like that.”

“Are you sure he wasn’t trying to sell you one of his bulbous Smuppet…toys?”

“Whatevs. The point is, I’m going to tell you a story. A story about how the Batterwitch is…AN ALIEN!”

Jane raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. Nonetheless, she took a seat on a pile of kitten plushies and waited as Roxy arranged her makeshift desk-turned-puppet-stage. She crouched below it and shuffled her puppets around.

From beneath the counter emerged a greyish-purple sock with orange pipe-cleaners for horns.

“Raaah! I am an evil witch Empress and this is my space kingdom!” announced the sock in a cartoonish voice. Roxy threw a number of orange beanbags at it with her other hand. “Oh nooo! I am besieged by meteors! I must escape to another universe!”

With a whiny _vworp vworp vworp_ noise, she shook the sock and it disappeared beneath the counter, where it was soon replaced by the Crockersock.

“Now I have arrived on Earth where I will continue my plans and dominate the land! Muahahahahaha! Do my bidding, oh naïve heiress!”

As she spoke, she lifted her other hand, and it too wore a sock, which was clearly meant to represent Jane. She arranged them so that the Batterwitch loomed over Jane, looking about as menacing as a sock could. (Which wasn’t very menacing at all.)

The socks disappeared and Roxy popped back up.

“So, watcha think?”

Jane stood up with a sigh and made her way over to the desk, snatching the Jane puppet from her best friend’s hand. She put it on, and it spoke for her:

“I think you are a very silly and imaginative young girl.”

Roxy pouted. “You don’t believe me?”

“It’s quite the… _yarn_.” Jane said, waving the sock about with a hearty _hoo hoo!_ for good measure.

Roxy retorted by whipping out a sock puppet with matted black hair and what looked like it was supposed to be a green coat.

“Well I believe her, Janey, and I would not be going about dating stuffy old nonbelievers like you, wot wot!” said the Jake puppet.

“Well I _never!_ ” gasped Jane, mock offense painting her face. “You didn’t even do his accent right, he doesn’t say ‘wot wot’.”

“Your _face_ doesn’t say wot wot!”

Jane scrambled for some supplies to make herself a Roxy puppet and start mocking her friend, and Roxy responded with a Dirk puppet, and soon enough they were all surrounded by sock puppet variations of all their friends and family. Jane looked around at all the puppets, and then at her friend; Roxy had puppet-herself on one hand and a fedora-wearing Mr. Puppet Crocker on the other hand and they were busy flirting.

“Look at us, playing around with all of these childish toys. Shouldn’t we be acting more like grown-ups?”

“That’s exactly what the Batterwitch wants you to do!” Roxy shouted, equipping the proper puppet in a flash and attacking Jane with it. Jane fought back and they collapsed into a pile of giggles and by the time Ms. Lalonde called them for supper and the both of them begged for ‘just a little more time to play’, Jane decided she really didn’t care about acting her age.

[ ](http://isthatwhatyoumint.tumblr.com/post/16198776187/so-a-bit-back-i-was-feeling-down-so-i-asked)

_[](http://isthatwhatyoumint.tumblr.com/post/16198776187/so-a-bit-back-i-was-feeling-down-so-i-asked)(Click on the picture to see it on Tumblr!)_

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was written for my friend Maya at http://isthatwhatyoumint.tumblr.com/, who also provided the excellent picture to go alongside it!


End file.
